Save My Marriage

Divorce is expensive and harmful to children that a divorcing couple might have. Child support arrangements can become complex and end up costing the non-custodial parent a significant amount of money, often withheld from his or her pay. If at all possible, couples should only pursue a divorce, only when all other attempts to save the marriage have failed. There are a number of ways to save a marriage, including couples therapy and dispute resolution. Even couples not considering divorce can benefit from services designed to save marriages. These “save my marriage” help to resolve disputes, break destructive patterns of behavior and foster better communication between the spouses?

How do I save my marriage?

For those that do not want to pursue outside services and would like to work on saving their marriage alone, this is probably not recommended, but possible. For couples that are not constantly or actively fighting, simply communicating is an excellent way to resolve disputes. Communicating does not mean arguing and this approach will only serve to entrench both spouses in their side of the argument, however irrational or irrelevant.

You must pursue communication with the intention of saving the marriage, by being honest about patterns of behavior you find objectionable and actions you feel compromise the integrity of the union. Again, care must be taken here to avoid outright criticism and belittlement. You must also be prepared to take criticism and if necessary avoid actively defending yourself as this may spark another argument. For this situation, a marriage counselor would be useful, to facilitate and moderate the discussion

What is marriage counseling and how does it save my marriage?

Marriage counseling exists to have a trained professional facilitate dialogue between bickering spouses. Through open and honest communication, spouses can resolve their problems and break patterns of behavior, often patterns they were unaware of, that affect the relationship. This is an effective way to save marriage. The marriage counselor is typically a trained professional with a degree, but the amount of input and intervention on his part will be limited to what the couple feels comfortable with accepting. Couples can work to save their marriage with the marriage counselor merely facilitating, although there is a good chance the marriage counselor will identify behaviors and actions causing the disagreements, often missed by both spouses.

What are alternatives to marriage counseling?

Is not necessary for couples to seek mandatory counseling services and any number of trusted persons can facilitate dialogue to save a marriage. For most people this will be a religious leader, trusted mutual friend or family member. There are inherent risks of introducing bias into the counseling if the other person does not remain completely impartial.Joint activities, ranging from a simple as shopping together to as complicated as marital boot camp can improve the bond between spouses and save marriage through partnership and increased interaction, which fosters lasting communication and trust.

Sexual tension can be a factor in marital stress resolving this issue can also help the health of a marriage. As farfetched as this solution sounds, some states will allow at-fault divorce on the grounds of not engaging in marital relations, in addition to other wrongs. Clearly, this is usually not a complete solution, but can help to facilitate communication, intimacy and reduce stress that might be affecting the marriage.

NEXT: What You Must Know About Marriage